Summary of a Surgery

Yo!

I can't believe it's been almost three weeks since Fanny's removal. My little "vacation" is almost over and I go back to work on Monday. While having a little break from work was nice, I'm rather looking forward to getting back to being a productive member of society again.

Today I figured I'd break down how my surgery and recovery went and how I improved as the days progressed...

Day of Surgery - At first I was going to say something about how little pain I was in, but then I tried to think about that day and I realized I do not remember much about it. I remember getting up to go to the bathroom, being in my car going home, walking up some of my stairs, and thats about it. I guess I was stoned off my ass. Honestly I'm surprised I was able to compose a blog post that day without mentioning unicorns or penguins. 

The Next 72 Hours - Again, I don't exactly remember everything. The incision area was slightly sore, but it wasn't bad at all. I had to be intubated during surgery so my throat was rather sore and I had a cough. Eventually it got to a point where my ribs and stomach muscles hurt from coughing. Overall it wasn't bad though, I was able to sit, stand, and walk with crutches. I was able to paint my nails the day after surgery ;)

The Next Few Days - The one problem with having the anti-nausea patch is that you don't throw up all the crap in your system, so it takes longer for everything to leave your system. There were are a few days when I felt verrrryyyyy heavy-headed. Bread would help for a little while but it would keep coming back. One day I felt even worse than usual, turns out I was running a 100.1 fever. Once the fever burned off I started feeling better (and blogging again). 

One Week - The surgery site was a teensy bit sore, but again nothing terrible. I started walking around my house sans crutches and I would only use one crutch when going out. 

10 Days Post Op - The staples came out and my incision was exposed and allowed to breathe! Me thinks at least a few parts of it are gonna keloid and I might end up with a good ol "Railroad track" scar from the staples themselves, but it's hard to tell.

11 Days Post Op - My incision does not like feeling exposed. It's in an awkward area and it does not like it when I move. I thought I felt it ripping a few times. Some bandaids were places on the scar to keep that skin from moving.

The Rest of that Damn Week - Holy crap my scar hurt. Now I feel closer to Harry Potter. Whenever I got up from either laying down or sitting my scar would hurt like a mofo. Without a doubt this was the most painful part of my surgery. I opted to relax for a few days and let my scar heal. The pain started to decrease with each passing day. 

Now - My scar almost feels back to normal. I hold it sometimes when I get up, but whatever pain I do have from it is very bearable. I can walk without my crutches, and without much of a limp. I'll probably be using my crutch outside of my home for a little while longer. 

All in all I am sooooooooooooooo pleased with how everything turned out. I was bracing for massive mobility restrictions and I lot of pain. Thank goodness it wound up being the total opposite. Even though there were some minor bumps in the recovery road, it was still really freaking easy.

Crippie's Tippie - Sometimes it's good to prepare for the worst. You're prepared in the event that it hits the fan, and you are extraordinarily happy when things go well. It's a win/win.

Pain, Pain Go Away

Yo! 

Yeaaaaaaaah, as the title suggests Crippie has been in a fair amount of pain over the past few days. Me thinks the weather is changing or something because Fanny the Ass Tumor, something on the back of my pelvis, and my hip socket and been acting up all at once. Crippie's flare up is so bad that her pain management appointment got bumped up to tomorrow. I'm probably looking at a med change. After that Crippie will monitor her pain levels and if they continue to suck... then it's off to the orthopedist I go.

In the meantime Crippie is using NPH for the back of my hip and my inner hip and Capsaicin for my outer side and front of my hip. WARNING: DO NOT PUT A HEAT PACK ON AN AREA THAT HAS CAPSAICIN ON IT. Capsaicin is one of those things you have to be super cautious about. When misused it causes a whole lotta discomfort. The mix of the two treatments has made my pain levels bearable so at least I'll be able to sleep tonight. 

Part of me thinks that all of this pain is due to an arthritis flare up, simply because it came on so suddenly. Usually my MHE problems takes months if not years to develop. Maybe it's just Crippie being in denial and not wanting to think about hip surgery, but I don't think my tumors could grow to this extent in a matter of a days. Crippie really hopes this is just an arthritis flare up.

Anyway, I'll definitely let y'all know how tomorrow goes. Crippie will be bringing her hip x-rays to the doctor tomorrow so she can clearly see what's going on. Wish me luck everybody :)

To make up for the short post today, here's a pic of Nellie and Frida sleeping

Crippie's Tippie - Capsaicin works, but you have to be reaaaaaalllllllllyyyyyyy careful with it

Heat Pack Challenge - Day 15

Hello!

First off, thank you all for the kind words about my product review, I really hope y'all enjoyed it. Crippie certainly had a lot of fun making it, although I realized that you could probably have a drinking game for every time I said "FREAKIN' AWESOME" but hey... all the more reason to watch the video, right ;)

Moving on, it's been a little over a week since I mentioned my FREAKIN AWESOME (yeah, I'm owning up to it) heat pack. I decided to name my heat pack Neil Patrick Harris, cause let's face it... NPH IS FREAKIN AWESOME. I've been using NPH every night for at least two hours and my pain levels have significantly decreased. The combination of heat and pain meds has put Crippie in a pretty happy place as far as pain management goes, and that's (say it with me now) FREAKIN AWESOME! Again, Crippie is well aware that using a heat pack for the duration of time is not recommended, but Crippie don't give a damn!

Since it's a short post today, here's some pictures of the animals!

Mama Pig being cute

Way to ruin the picture mom - Aggi

Helen sleeping on my bed

Angel says "What? Your bed is comfy... sue me" (and thats my old heat pack next to her)

Crippie's Tippie - Heat packs are awesome, but they are not magic cure alls. If something is really bothering you consult a doctor.

Heat Pack Challenge - Day 2

Howdy Y'all!

Crippie has an announcement to make... I am in love with my heat pack. Crippie used the heat pack again last night and yet again my hip didn't hurt! I was skeptical last too... cause the weather is going through some super fun changes which generally mean a lot of pain. I still can't believe that the heat is stopping my pain. It's weird, now that I'm not in as much pain I can really see how much pain I was actually in. I'm so used to being in pain, it's feels really strange to be without... awesome... but strange nonetheless.
To be fair, it's not like Crippie is just putting a heat pack on for 20 minutes and the pain magically vanishes. Crippie is putting heat on her hip for a solid 5+ hours. Now some people might say "Whoaaaa... isn't that dangerous?" If I was placing this on bare skin it could potentially be dangerous. Crippie is not placing the heat pack directly on her skin. Crippie is well aware that this is not necessarily the safest practice in the world, but honestly I don't care. My hip doesn't hurt. The end justifies the means.
Now all I really need to do is name my heat pack. Since it's hot I reckon it should be named after some totally awesome actor. What do you guys think I should name my heat pack?

Crippie's Tippie - Heat is awesome, but be cautious when using it in excessive amounts like me

Everything Went Better Than Expected

Ohai!

It looks like Crippie's great quest for a heat pack ended rather quickly. Crippie went to Kmart and obtained a Sunbeam Extra Large Electric Moist Heat Pack. I'll admit, I had really low expectations when it came to this heat pack... some relief and maybe it won't catch on fire. I figured I'd test out the new heat pack when my hip pain is at it's worst... at night.
First off... no heat pack product suggests that you use it while sleeping. There is a chance you can burn yourself. Crippie is rebel and completely disregards those warnings! My reflexes are quick enough to remove it if something starts to hurt. Also, this heat pack has a two-hour timer so I don't really have to worry about fires, which is nice.
I used the max heat setting, which was hot but not "OMG I JUST BURNED MY FREAKING LEG" hot, just the right amount of moist heat IMO. I was able to wrap the heat pack around the heat pack around my hip and leg area, which was rather nice because I wasn't overheating in a giant heated blanket. After about 30 of heat I started to notice that my hip wasn't hurting. I didn't have a feeling that a lead balloon was expanding in my hip. Shocked by this discovery I figured I'd just try lying down in some random position with the heat still secured to my hip. Generally speaking I can lay still for maybe 5 minutes before it gets too uncomfortable and then I switch positions. I got into my random position, watched some TV and before I knew it 30 minutes had passed! I couldn't believe it, I was able to lay down in one position for a relatively lengthy period of time. I can count the number of times I've been able to do that with one hand, and all the instances involved some really strong pain meds. After that I figured I should actually try to go to sleep, so I got into a comfy position with my heat pack and stayed in that position until I fell asleep!
I still can't believe it, I had a night where my hip didn't hurt me! I was actually able to fall asleep like a normal person! When I woke up in the morning my hip felt pretty good. I didn't notice quite as many popping noises from my hip today. I'm using the heat pack right now and my hip isn't hurting!
Crippie is really freaking happy. My hip has been the bane of my existence for 5+ years. I've had to cope with the pain every night for years, all of the sudden a simple heat pack is making it go away. To go from being in constant pain to near nothing... that feeling is indescribable. The only downside now that I think about is "CRAP... I'VE BEEN NEEDLESSLY SUFFERING FOR OVER 5 YEARS... FFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUU".
I really hope I'm not jinxing myself again by posting this, but even if I did, at least I had one night of no pain. I'll definitely keep y'all updated on the miraculous heat pack cure.

BTW - If anyone is wondering specifically what kind of pain the miraculous heat pack is curing, it is helping relieve inflammation from arthritis.

Crippie's Tippie- HEAT PACKS ARE FREAKING AWESOME... OOOOMMMMGGGG

Crippie Plays Catch Up

Sup Everybody?

My cold is finally starting to go away... YAY! I can breathe again!!! Apart from the general annoyance of the cold, it was really starting to get painful, tumors in my ribs were catching when I coughed, hella painful. Anywhooo today Crippie figured she'd talk about some random things that have been on her mind recently...

- Anybody watch the Oscars? Crippie enjoys watching award shows and picking out the winners regardless of whether or not she knows what she is talking about. I did pretty well last night, got a vast majority of my answers correctly. The biggest bummer of the night... WHY DIDN'T HARRY POTTER WIN ANYTHING? I mean, c'mon couldn't the academy at least recognize them for their make-up? Biggest moment of awesome (for me anyway)... when "The Descendants" won an award for it's script. Why? Because this means the academy agrees with Crippie in how the movie is not offensive in any way, shape or form. Snaps for validating my opinions. 

- Now that my cold is going away I can focus on trying to sleep again. Last night I fell asleep around 5:30am. The night before that it was 4:00. Crippie really needs to think of some sleeping techniques. Oh, and for those who suggested either Tylenol or Advil PM... Crippie used to take those to go sleep for several years. What happens when you take a drug regularly for several years? You basically become immune to it. Alas they no longer have any effect on me. 

- Crippie visits her pain management doctor on Thursday. My mom really wants me to consider the anti-depressant as a pain medication route again. This time we are gonna go to the doctor specifically discussing my hip pain (normally I just say I'm in pain from the neck down). I'm gonna bring my hip x-rays and discuss how I want to preserve my hips for as long as possible. Although part of me thinks I should probably be talking with my ortho about that, which reminds me... I haven't had an othro appointment in over a year, YAY ME! 

- The piggies are starting to get dirty, I guess that means it's time to bathe the piggies. Something tells me Thursday will be spent at the doctor's office and then bathing and blow drying pigs (yes, I actually use a hair dryer on the piggies). Anyone interested in seeing pics of that super fun event? 

- Speaking of piggies, here's some pictures of Frida sleeping in Nellie's house. Ever since Frida managed to get in Nellie's house she has refused to come out :D

- So yeah, that's about it. Random jumble of a post. Crippie's thoughts get jumbled at 3:00am... which is mainly why I NEED TO FRIGGIN SLEEEEEEEEEP!

Crippie's Tippie's - In this day of digital x-rays its super easy to ask for a copy, they can be emailed to you too! 

Crippie Submits To A Random Drug Test!

Ohai!

Crippie certainly had an eventful day today. I had my pain management appointment in the morning. It went better than expected. My doctor opted to not change the dosage of my medicine, but the amount of pills I have. That way if I need more I can use it. I'm very relieved that I didn't need a full out dosage increase. The doctor also recommended that I take extra strength acetaminophen during the day as needed. Also, as the title suggests I had to submit to a random drug test, just to make sure that Crippie isn't a druggie. Funny story about that, the drug test involves peeing in a cup. The nurse gave me a cup with a very secure lid on it and showed me to the bathroom. I go into the bathroom, try to open the cup, and gosh darn it I cannot get the damn cup open (arthritis + stupid cup = lethal combo). So Crippie had to go back to the nurse and ask her to open the pee cup, that wasn't humiliating at alllllll. Once the drug test was completed we continued on to do other errands.
My mom and I went to get some supplies for the pets at a local petco, and while I really do not advise buying any animals from there I couldn't help but snap a few shots of some the little critters they had.

Speaking of cute animals, Frida is in the running to be featured on a site about cute animals. Vote for her HERE. 

Anyway, after we finished running errands I collapsed on the couch for the next few hours. I'd call today a success. I took the extra dose of medicine tonight, let's hope it works.

Crippie's Tippie- If you know that you have issues opening jars, ask the nurse to open your pee cup BEFORE you go into the bathroom. 

NHBPM- 5 Thing-ies That Changed Crippie

Hey Y'all

I had my pain management appointment today. My doctor quickly shut down the anti-depressant idea for me for several reasons...

1- I'm not depressed, and anti-depressants can have some pretty unfortunate side effects

2- I'm young and she doesn't want me to start on an anti-depressant regime for the next few decades

3- While anti-depressants can be used for pain relief it is meant for older people with a different kind of pain. It's more for fibromyalgia related pain, not there is a tumor pressing against your hip socket pain. 

Now, on to today's NHBPM post. Today's topic is...

5 things that changed my life. For better? For worse? List 5 things that changed your life as a patient, caregiver, or Health Activist and how.

1) My first birthday- The day I was diagnosed with MHE. Pretty self explanatory of why that changed my life.

2) My first surgery- I was ten years old. My first surgery was supposed to be a fairly easy with a quick recovery. It ended up causing massive complications and the worst pain I'll probably ever experience. I was forced to grow up very quickly in order to deal with everyhing. Before my surgery I was a child with a minor disability. After the surgery I was a young adult with a severe disability.

3) Crippie Meets Fellow Crippies- When I was younger I thought I was all alone with my disability, but after my first surgery my family started reaching out to other families with MHE. Within the next two years I was in contact with several Crippies my age and we became friends (I'm still in touch with most of 'em btw). From that point on I stopped feeling alone and pitying myself.

4) Physical Therapy- I've had PT on and off for the past 12 years. When I started PT it was incredibly painful. The therapists were crying watching me struggle. One of my therapists told me that if I wanted to get better I would have to deal with the pain and work through it. This was a huge epitome moment for me. I worked really hard at my therapy, struggled through the pain, and saw results. I have applied this philosophy to everything else I have ever done. If ever I feel like I can't do something, I push myself and try to make it happen. 

5) CRIPPLEFEST- Every year we have a gathering of cripples at my house. It really is one of the biggest highlights of my year. Apart from it being a blast, it has always been a day of support and activism for us. I became a mentor for some of the younger cripples and I am trying to see to it that my little "buddies" don't suffer in the way that I did.

So those are the main things that transformed Crippie into the cripple she is. Most of them sprung out of the first surgery one, the more I think about it the more realize how much that bastard screwed me up.

Crippie's Tippie- Even though something royally sucks and has probably changed your life in a negative way that doesn't mean something good can't come out of it. Without that first surgery I never would have met my cripples! 

This post was written as part of NHBPM – 30 health posts in 30 days: http://bit.ly/vU0g9J 

Crippie Talks About Tylenol... FUNNESS

Oh hai... again

Just saw an article on the news that said the makers of Tylenol are cutting the maximum dose from 4,000mg to 3,000 mg. I hope that this further proves what I have been saying for a good long while that pain meds are serious business... even in the over the counter format.

And for those who think that few people take 4,000mg of Tylenol a day... *does calculations* I've had to take 4,000mg a day before, several times. Now I take about 1,500mg of it daily and I was carefully instructed by my doctor to not go over that, because I'm gonna be taking this stuff for the rest of my life, I run a fair risk of stomach and liver damage.

Medications are a serious matter and should not be taken lightly people!

Crippie's Tippie- Be careful of what you take, always follow the labels on the bottle, and never take more than the max dose.

Crippie Cannot Come Up With An Innovative Title

Hello,

OH NOES, I'VE LOST MY SARCASM AND WIT, HOW WILL I GO ONNNNNNNN!

Before I begin my post I want to send my well wishes to the people of Norway. I cannot imagine the heartbreak those families are going through. Some of my best cripple buddies live in Norway and I am so thankful that they are unharmed.

Alas, I don't have any cripple related questions to answer today, but I will tell you about my day and the next couple of days ahead. It is gonna be oddly busy after all.

I went to my pain management doctor today. I'm still good with my pain meds, but I have to cut down on my arthritis medicine by half, otherwise it might cause an ulcer one day... uh oh. If I do get an ulcer I won't be able to take this medication ever again... double uh oh. So like I said here, pain medications and medication in general are not something to be taken lightly. It is a serious matter and it could have very dangerous consequences. Worst case scenario, I overdose and die, see... very serious consequences.

Even though I occasionally get bad news at doctor's visits, apparently I'm quite a hoot while I'm there. Here's what I did today...
1) Wrote a song for "Soylent Green: The Musical!" to the tune of Edelweiss.
2) Told a nurse that I only go to the Target pharmacy because they have pretty bottles (which is true).
3) Got my doctor to give out my business cards to her patients (I love my doctor).

While it was a very entertaining doctors visit, the visit itself along with the trip to Target to get my meds refilled rendered me useless for the day. It's also raining here so that didn't help.

Tomorrow is my intake appointment for job placement help. I'm not exactly nervous about the meeting, more curious if anything. I just don't know what to expect. I have my resume, portfolio, business cards, samples of work to bring with me so I think I'm prepared for everything. I'll definitely update the blog tomorrow to let y'all know what the intake is like.

Saturday is gonna be awesome, it's CRIPPLEFEST! Cripplefest is a small gathering that has been occurring at my house since I was 12 where people with my disability come over and hang out for the day. We eat, have scar wars, have tumor wars, epic cane battles, and in general make a bunch of cripple related jokes. Cripplefest is one of the highlights of my year, I love not being the only cripple in a room and I REALLY love being in a place where crippies are not the minority. It's super fun!

So in conclusion to this really hodge-podged post... um.... yeaaaahhh... I got nothing

Crippie's Tippie- Make sure you like your doctors, if you think your doctor is a dick you're less likely to do what they tell you to do.

IT'S GON' RAIN!

Hello!

As my fellow New Yorkers might have noticed... this past week's weather has been interesting to say the least. We had a few good torrential downpours by me. When normal people hear the words "IT'S GON' RAIN" from any weather person apart from Ollie Williams they generally think time to get out the umbrella ella ella ella eh eh... DAMN RIHANNA. When I hear "IT'S GON' RAIN" I think "IT'S GON' HURT". As mentioned here, one of the reasons I am a crippie is that I have arthritis. My arthritis is on the minor side compared to, let's say an elderly person, but I have it none the less. Changes in barometric pressure and humidity have a profound effect on people with arthritis. Said changes cause our joints to further swell, and thus more pain. Several of this weeks storms literally rendered me useless. I was going to blog about something but I could barely move my hands. Again, keep in mind my arthritis isn't terrible, I can only imagine what people with severe arthritis go though. So what does a crippie do in times of massive weather changes? I recommend the following things...
1) Pain medications
2) Moist heat
3) Rest

On to more pressing issues. Whilst rendered useless I went to www.urbandictionary.com and typed in the word "crippie". Much to my dismay the definition had NOTHING to do with cripples at all, it meant "very good pot". I tried to add my own definition for the word, but alas it was rejected. Loyal readers, join me in revamping Urban Dictionary's definition of the word crippie by submitting your own definition. If possible, try not to make it about drugs or some perverted sex act... it's been done enough.

Crippie's Tippie- Arthritis can be a bitch if not properly treated and managed. If you have arthritis, take care of yourself. Do your exercises, take your medicines, take your vitamins, etc. I recommend Omega 3 fish oils, glucosamine, and chondroitin. 

I'll Bust A Capsaicin In Yo....

Sup

Last weekend I went on a super quick vacation to Tennessee. Whilst in Cracker Barrel, one of the greatest restaurants of all time I came across this...

This has to be the shnazziest pain relieving liniment I've ever seen. Maybe it's just the graphic designer in me, but I wouldn't be ashamed to have this in my medicine drawer. Alas I did not obtain this product. I chose not to because the main ingredient is capsaicin. It's not the capsaicin doesn't work. Quite the contrary actually. I use it when I have really bad nerve flare ups. The problem I have with capsaicin is that it burns like a mofo after coming into contact with water. I used it once on my leg and took a shower several HOURS later. There was a burning sensation on my leg as soon as it hit the water. It took several hours and lots of ice for it to go away. Thinking it was just a happy coincidence I still used capsaicin after that. One day I washed my hands hours after putting capsaicin on my fingers, naturally my fingers start burning. It took a fair amount of menthol to get them to stop. So now I use capsaicin veeerrrrrryyyyyyyyyyyy gingerly and I make sure not to come into contact with water for at least a day. Also, you do NOT want this stuff anywhere near your eyes, bad things happen. But ultimately I chose not to buy it because I am a broke ass college grad.

Crippie's Tippie- If you need it, capsaicin works. But be prepared to FEEL THE BURN.