I'm Still Not Afraid

Howdy Y'all! 

It's almost August 16th, and y'all know what that means right? It means that in a mere one month and two days I will be bidding adieu to Fanny the Ass Tumor. If it sounds like I'm excited, that's because I am. I cannot wait for her to be gone. I wonder what it will feel like to have her out, I'm sure my sciatic nerve will thank me. 

As I've said before, I'm rarely nervous in the weeks prior to surgery, even when I'm not particularly thrilled about the surgery in questions. There would be times when I would get a little uneasy though, mainly when I would get the forms for the surgery in the mail, or getting my pre-ops done, etc. Well, yesterday I received the forms for my surgery... instead of thinking "Eh crap, surgery" I thought "YUUUUUUUUUUUUUSSSSSSSSSS". Lol, just as I was typing that Fanny sent a shooting pain up my spine. Maybe she doesn't like that I'm saying bad things about her ;) Bring it on, you won't be my problem for much longer!!! 

In guinea pig news, the Mama, Maggie, Nellie, and Frida are continuing to bond. Maggie is so happy to have company that her appetite has increased dramatically. When she was alone she hardly touched her hay, now she'll nosh on it throughout the day. She's starting to grow on the rest of the group, her introduction is actually going a lot smoother than Nellie's intro did. I'm pleasantly surprised with how well this has gone, and I'm kicking myself for not doing it sooner. 

In dog news, Helen went to the vet a few days ago for a check-up and some vaccines. While she was a very good girl the shots hurt her shoulders and they made her verrrrrryyyyyy sleepy. Helen is a lazy bum to begin with, so this just made her even more tired. How tired do you say? Well.......

She fell asleep while walking to her dinner. Helen is feeling much better now, but that was probably one of the cutest damn things I've ever seen in my life. Also, how trippy is my kitchen floor. Gotta love the 70's! 

Alas, I should probably head off to bed now, I've got another busy day ahead of me tomorrow.

Crippie's Tippie - try to see the good things in every situation. On the dark side I'm having surgery, on the bright side I will finally be rid of Fanny! 

The Jitter Bugs

Ohai

The Aggie Update - Yup, Aggie is gonna have her own update for the next week or so. Aggie had her first ever vet visit this morning. She did very well and the vet confirmed my diagnoses. Aggie scratched her cornea, she might have even punctured her eye a little. We have to give her eye drops every eight hours (around the clock), antibiotics twice a day, and pain medicine one a day as needed. She doesn't appear to be in any sort of pain, but... SHE SCRATCHED HER DAMN EYE!!! That has to hurt. I dunno, I have not noticed any behavioral changes in her. Apart from the cloudy eye I can't tell anything is wrong. Even though I probably said this many times last night, I'll say it again... IF YOUR PIG IS SICK, TAKE THEM TO THE VET!!! Aggie's eye could have gotten horribly infected if left untreated.

Moving on, I have some news regarding Fanny. For those of you who might not remember, Fanny is a grapefruit sized tumor on the back of my hips. Fanny is literally a pain in my ass, mainly because she is pressing against my sciatic nerve. FANNY IS COMING OUT PEOPLES! Fanny's coming out party will take place on September 18th. This will be my 11th surgery and I'm honestly for the most part excited. Fanny hurts like a mofo and I really want her out. Also I'll be able to make soooooooooooo many "This Is Spinal Tap" jokes! It will go to 11 people!

People frequently ask me if I am nervous about having surgeries. From here to the 16th the answer is no. I've had 10 surgeries already so I'm pretty much used to it. Granted, this surgery will be a same-day procedure and it shouldn't be terribly invasive (compared to other surgeries I've had). If this was a massive "REPLACE ALL THE HIPS" surgery I'd be singing a different tune.

If you asked me this question the day before the surgery my answer will be "yeeeeeeaaaaaaahhhhhhh". Since I've had 10 surgeries already I know what to expect, both good and bad. I know what it feels like to wake up from sedation, and I realllllyyyyy don't like that feeling. I hate being in the recovery room. I hate getting an IV. I hate everything about the day of surgery. Yeah, I definitely get the pre-surgery jitters. Usually I get a case of the shakes, with the occasional bout of feeling nauseous. I am so predictable with this pattern, I usually take valium the day before to calm me down, and to help prevent some of the sickness. For my last surgery I was prescribed a patch that would alleviate most of the nausea, and it definitely helped... to a degree. I usually get sick no matter what.

Hopefully my my hatred of Fanny will overpower my hatred of surgery. I have to remember that I will be in the hospital for about 12 hours. September 18th might suck... but ultimately it will be a party. I will be celebrating that the bane of my existence for the past 5 or so years will be removed.

Also, Frida wanted me to remind you all that the Artist of her namesake would have turned 105 today. VIVA FRIDA! Yes... Crippie collects Frida Kahlos :)

Crippie's Tippie - If you are like me and freak out right before a surgery... drugs are your friend