Well... That's Special

Ohai!

Yup, I still realllllllllyyyyy suck. But I swear I have something for y'all tonight that more than makes up for my absence. I'll show you that later. In the meantime here's what's been going on here...

I have been in a LOT of pain. The past couple of months have been terrible pain wise. Wanna know why? Remember how Fanny irritated my sciatic nerve? Well... it looks like even though Fanny is gone the sciatica remains, and it's been having a massive flair up with this weather. To make matters worse I went to my doctor on Wednesday, she said apart from the increase in pain I'm probably developing a tolerance to my pain meds. In other words, I'm in more pain and my pain meds are no longer effective. SUPER DOOPER! My doctor wanted me to take two Neurontins, one in the morning and one at night. I tried the one in the morning thing... but that rendered me useless for the rest of the day. No good. No good at all. So I'm taking the two at night instead. Seems to be helping thus far... still in pain... but not as much. Blah.

I've been trying to be a social creature, YAY ME! On Sunday I had a "Walking Dead" Party with some of my friends. We had a grand ol' time eating brain cupcakes and watching the show. Random, but I hope I'm not the only cripple who related to this scene...

I actually have plans for this weekend too. On Saturday AND Sunday! HOLY CRAP! Working on New Year's Resolutions... LIKE A BOSS! 

So... on to that special treat that I totally owe you guys. A little backstory first. On Valentine's day my dad got me a helium filled balloon. Ok? A couple of days ago it started to die so I figured it was time to cut the balloon and let it go free. The thing is I couldn't let perfectly good helium go to waste. The result is this... I think there might be a swear or two somewhere in there... whoops

Crippie Inhales Helium from Special McSpecial on Vimeo.
Sorry about all the nose scratches... allergies are a bitch. If y'all are wondering my sister is the one singing opera and swearing in the background ;) 
Crippie's Tippie - Take a note from Hershel, if some random person asks to see your specialness, demand alcohol from them! 

Four's Company

Salutations!

The Quartet wants to thank everyone who called them adorable. Phase Two of the introduction phase is going quite swimmingly. Maggie had a rough day yesterday with lots of tears, but today she made a complete 180. She was wandering around the cage, eating, drinking, hanging out with her new buddies, etc. She seems very excited about the new living arrangement. Nellie, Mama, and Frida aren't exactly as enthralled as she is, but they tolerate her. One thing I've noticed with the piggies in general is that they are happier when in larger groups versa just pairs. When Mama and Frida were in a cage by themselves they would constantly bicker, Frida would stand on Mama's face to get attention and just be an all around asshole. Once Nellie joined the mix they were all visibly happier. Just goes to show ya folks, unless your pig is a freak of nature like Aggie, the more the merrier.

To those of y'all wondering how the lone wolf is doing, she's very content. Aggie's always been a bit of loner, she seems much more relaxed now that Maggie is no longer stealing her hay.

In cripple related business, I was rather achy today. I think I might've pulled a muscle in my bum during yesterday's introduction (I had to bend down to move piggies). Nothing a little heat won't cure but still, weird. I'm also contemplating obtaining one of those heated chair massager things for work. Me thinks it could help my back and bum. Can any of my lovely readers recommend any good ones?

Fanny probably had a role to play in today's pulled muscle (she rubs against that one). This might be my first surgery where I am really, really, really excited about having it. Also, I found out that I can't keep Fanny in a jar once she's removed. Alas, I guess I'll just have to stick to pictures ;)

Sorry for the short-ish post, I'm super tired and I've got a long day ahead of my tomorrow. Night y'all!

Crippie's Tippie - Pigs are very social creatures, they like having oodles of friends

That Went Better Than Expected

Ohai!

The Mama Pig Update - She seems to be stable again. She probably had a very minor UTI that we were able to treat by flushing her out. It's become pretty apparent that Mama, Frida, and Nellie are genetically prone to UTIs and bladder issues. Knowing this Crippie has to make a special effort to keep their tushies clean. This involves changing their bedding more frequently, occasionally wiping their butts with a pet wipe, and maybe trimming the fur by their bums. Sure, it's a little more effort, but it's soooooo much easier than taking care of a pig with a massive UTI.

I hope all my crippled comrades are having a lovely week. Crippie's week is going oddly well. First off, Crippie managed to redesign the blog (one of my new year's resolution)! It's not completely done yet, but I figured out how to make a custom navigation bar and remove some parts of the HTML/CSS coding that I didn't like in the original theme! YAY ME! If anyone is wondering how I did this, Crippie has a very basic knowledge of HTML and CSS, and what I didn't know I looked up and occasionally just googled "how do I make a custom navigation bar on blogger" or "How do I get rid of the white panels in my blogger theme". Crippie used Adobe Illustrator to make her new header and menu, I lurv me some Adobe Illustrator. Overall the whole process was much less daunting than I thought it would be. Crippie thought she was gonna crash the blog or something, soooooo happy I didn't break this thing.

On Thursday I went to my bi-monthly pain management appointment. It went very well and we bowed down to my doctor for guessing the whole sciatica thing before anyone else. She recommended that I do exercises to keep my sciatica at bay for the time being. My doctor also told me how much full blown sciatica sucks, so that reaffirmed my decision to remove Fanny.

Speaking of Fanny, today I decided to tell my boss that I will need 2-3 weeks off of work to have surgery. Crippie's opted to be very upfront with her. I told her that I have a genetic disorder that causes bone tumors to grow on my bones, that I have a tumor the size of a grapefruit on the back of my hip, and that I need to have it removed. My boss was super nice and supportive about the whole thing. I did stress that the surgery doesn't have to be done immediately so I can wait for a slow period in work. She said that if that doesn't work, she can just hire a temp for 2 weeks, no big deal. Soooooooooo relieved. I was nervous as to how my boss would react to me telling her what was wrong with me, her only question for me was "Are you in pain?". It was kinda adorable actually. It's good to know that my boss actually cares. Now Crippie has to try to schedule her surgery, that'll be interesting to say the least.

Crippie's Tippie - If your boss/doctor/superior/whatever doesn't care about your general well being... they suck

Back To Business

Ohai!

Crippie hopes everyone has been enjoying their week thus far. Mine has been getting increasingly better. Mama Pig is slowly but surely continuing to recover. Crippie is still flushing her out every night but it's becoming so much easier. Since Crippie doesn't have work tomorrow I'll probably be flushing Mama several times tomorrow, hopefully that will get the remaining crap out. 

Since Mama Pig has been feeling better all the piggies have really enjoyed mooching off her illness. She needs extra food and it is impossible to just feed one piggie ;). Also Nellie and Aggie really love Pedialyte and water mixed together, so they get a little bit of "special juice" when Mama gets it. 

Now the Mama Pig seems to be stabilizing Crippie can start blogging about things other than guinea pigs... shocking! In cripple news, I'm still waiting for approval for my MRI. We're gonna call tomorrow and be all like "Ohai, I can haz approval? kthnxbai". Crippie really wants to get the ball rolling with this thing. I want to get this damn MRI done, find out whats going on, and treat it. Crippie feels like this Fanny matter is holding me back. Crippie isn't afraid of this pending MRI at all... I'm not claustrophobic (I rather enjoy small spaces) and I'm not prone to headaches. I'm not afraid of having Fanny removed if need be. At this point, Crippie just wants to nip this thing in the butt (pun intended)

The rain has also been kicking Crippie's ass and furthering her desire to get this damn MRI done. I really don't enjoy saying "the rain is making my arthritis and sciatica act up", definitely doesn't sound like something your average 23 year old would say. Oh well, Crippie is coping with the weather as best as she can. I have a bottle of extra strength tylenol at work and I've been popping several of those bad boys a day. Crippie is also having a flare up in her right hand and index finger. Crippie tries to stretch out her fingers and muscles when this happens, it makes my hand look like a claw but it's oddly comfy. Currently my hand is wrapped up in an ace bandage, again feels surprisingly comfy. 

So that's about it folks. Mama Pig is getting better and I hate changes with barometric pressure. I eagerly await to blog about things other than sick piggies, like the Tony nominations for example! 

Crippie's Tippie - Be cautious if you plan on popping tylenol like candy. Like most pain meds it can do damage to your tummy if you have massive amounts of it. I try not to go over 2,500mg a day, but that's just Crippie.

Wow, My Hips Suck

Hiya!

Oh my good n' plenty thank you guys so much for your ninja healing vibes! I think they might've worked!
Alright, so here's how Crippie's appointment went... first the nurse who brought me to my room asked me some questions. She must've been new because she asked these questions while the door was still open and she left the x-rays of the last patient on the computer screen. While waiting for my doctor I analyzed the x-rays of the person before me. Crippie thinks their leg had to be broken and straightened with a rod a screws. Then my doctor came in for my check-up. The main focus was my hip. I mentioned that a tumor could be irritating the sciatic nerve. He did an exam which more or less involved poking my ass, it was kinda painful and I'm ticklish so I was giggling most of the time. He also asked how I know it's a tumor pressing on the nerve. The conversation that followed was pretty funny in my opinion...

Doctor - What makes you think a tumor is pressing on that nerve, can you feel a tumor?
Crippie - Most definitely, it's visible on my back
*doctor goes to examine my back and discovers Fanny The Ass Tumor*
Doctor - WHOA... yeaaaaaaaah... let's get you some x-rays

Then Crippie went into the x-ray room. I've had too many x-rays to count, Crippie is kinda upset that I can't glow in the dark yet. Anyway, it's kinda cute to see how the x-ray technician treats me. They always think I'm a n00b and try to be super gentle with me. Go figure this guy sounded super sweet and gentle but I don't think he realized his own strength. He was kinda rough positioning me, you'd think that if someone's x-ray order was for their hips you wouldn't grab the hip to position it. So the x-ray portion was uncomfortable to say the least, but the end results are totally worth the pain for me.

The top x-ray is my new one. The bottom one is the old one for comparison. As you can see Fanny The Ass Tumor has grown quite a bit since my last x-ray. The doctor says I need an MRI to determine is Fanny is irritating my nerve. If that's the case... Fanny's gotta go. On the plus side, that's not a terribly invasive surgery. Shockingly, Crippie has never had an MRI before, so that will be a fun new experience.

As for the whole "I CAN'T SIT" problem, according to the x-ray there are no tumors in that area that would cause a problem. My doctor thinks this issue exists because I am relatively petite, on the skinny side, and I sit down a lot. So apparently my ability to sit has cost me my ability to sit. Damn you irony, damn you. The doctor says a shot of cortisone to the butt could help. The thing is Crippie has an aversion to Cortisone and to having a needle in my ass. Yes, Crippie is well aware that I can tolerate a surgery but not a shot of cortisone in my ass... MOAR IRONY!!! Any suggestions about what to do readers?

Crippie is soooooooooooo glad that her appointment went better than expected. Mama Pig is doing well for the time being. She's getting tired of her medicine, at least she doesn't fight us about it (well, she took a wee on my mom who holding while I fed her). She sends everyone purrs, wheeks, and kisses. She loves attention from people, regardless of where they are.

Crippie's Tippie - The ability to read x-rays comes in realllllllyyyyyyyy handy at times

Side Effects

Ohai 

I hope everyone had a good Monday. Crippie's Monday was alright, but the weather has definitely been kicking Crippie's ass. It was around 80 degrees last week and now it's 50 degrees WTF! MOTHER NATURE HATES CRIPPLES! Crippie just wants to grab a bunch of aerosol cans and spray them in air while screaming "EFF YOU MOTHER NATURE!!!".

On the bright side my hip isn't bothering me as much now since I started taking my neurontin. I have been having some minor side effects though... depending on the time I take the neurontin I get very tired and heavy headed. I took my medicine a little later tonight so right now Crippie is very heavy headed, not a pleasant feeling. On the bright side, the tiredness could help regulate my sleep schedule. 

It's weird... only parts of Crippie feel tired. I'm conscious enough to write a blog while chatting with friends (multi-tasking baby!). Yet my eyes feel super heavy and the back of my head feels heavy... I dunno... kinda hard to explain. At least I'm not trippin' or anything, Crippie is perfectly lucid... OMG LOOK AT THE UNICORN, IT'S SO SHINYYYYYYY ;). 

Yeaaaaaaah, I think I'm gonna go to sleep. Sorry for the short post y'all. I'll take some cute pictures of animals and show them to you tomorrow. Let's hope that the side effects of the neurontin wear off after a few days.

Crippie's Tippie - Don't blog when you're really tired, it won't turn out well

Blame Sciaticaaaaaaa

Whoa Man,

Did all of my totally far out readers have a groovy 4/20? In all seriousness though, Yom HaShoah or Holocaust Remembrance Day was this week. Before Crippie actually starts her post I wanted to post some songs for Holocaust Remembrance Day...

Moving on to cripple stuff, Crippie's first night with neurontin went relatively well. Most of the aching in my hips went away! The only side effect thus far is that is makes me sorta tired. Crippie can also feel when the medicine kicks in and when it wears off... I'm not sure but I don't think that's good (me thinks it means that I am in a lot pain without it). I was able to get through work with minimal pain, but by the time I got home the meds wore off, so I took them again in the late evening. The meds plus work made me super tired so I slept till dinner. After dinner I played with the pets for a while and then I got tired again. These hip problems are just sucking the energy out of me, it seems like I can hardly do anything right now, and whatever is causing the discomfort sitting makes it hard to sit in certain places in my house. It's getting rather frustrating. Oh well, Crippie has an appointment for the orthopedist on May 3rd. On the bright side, I made it for a year and half without having to see him. I think that's a personal best.

Crippie is trying to get used to this whole "having sciatica" thing... Crippie is wondering if any of her wonderful readers have sciatica and what do y'all do for it? Any tippies for me? If you don't want to leave a comment a private message would be lovely.

On a completely random nerd note... Crippie plays Pottermore (SLYTHERIN BABY) if anyone wants to add me I'm JinxHazel23969

Crippie's Tippie - When times get a little tough, remember that it will pass. It might take a while but it will pass nonetheless