NHBPM - Crippie Calls BS

Ohai Y'all

Happy Monday everybody! Me thinks I'll actually follow a prompt today... SHOCKING! Today's prompt is...

Call BS on something. What's something that's just ridiculous? 

Alrighty... I'm gonna call BS on myself today. Why? Well ya see, Crippie had a very long day at work (got home a little after 9pm). I then decided to take my melatonin gummies around 10. I thought it wouldn't make me overly tired or anything, so I wouldn't have to worry about being coherent or not being able to blog tonight. LOL NOPE! I got really freaking tired. Dumb ass me still thought I would be able to write and make sense. So I sat down and looked at the prompt... this was me for the next 30 minutes...

uuuuummmmm, uggggghhhhhhhhh *starts nodding off* NO I MUST BLOG! uuuuuhhhhhhhh, ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmm *startings listening to Gangnam Style to stay conscious enough to blog* ummmmmmmmmmm WHY IS THINKING SO HARD

Eventually I realized that I was being an idiot, and with that realization I found inspiration for tonight's post. BUT I'm still about to pass out, yet I'm forcing myself to stay awake to blog. With that, I am ridiculous. I know that I really need to get my ass to sleep, I am ready to fall asleep, yet I keep myself awake. That's some straight up bull crap!

I'm going to go to sleep now, tomorrow I'm probably gonna read this and facepalm.

Night y'all

Crippie's Tippie - If you're tired... don't be an idiot... GO TO SLEEP

Insomnia For Gummies

Ohai

I hope everyone had an excellent Veteran's/Remembrance Day, may we never forget their sacrifices.

One day in and I'm already ignoring blog prompts... lawlz. Today's topics didn't quite inspire me. Besides, I have a better topic to discuss!

As some of y'all might remember I have been having a rather unpleasant bout with insomnia over the past few months. Honestly, I've had difficulty sleeping for as long as I can remember. When I was a kid I had terrible thoughts that would keep me up, solved by a TV in my room. When I was a teenager I was in too much pain to sleep, solved by a memory foam bed. In high school and parts of college I took Advil PM or Tylenol PM... they helped me sleep until I became immune to them. I got used to not being able to fall asleep and just kinda dealt with it until recently. While I was recovering from my surgery I had no reason to get up at any specific time so what sleep schedule I had got totally out of whack. I was falling asleep at 5 in the morning and waking up some time in the late afternoon. That was the straw that broke the cripple's back. I needed to do something about this whole sleep thing... STAT!

What to do though? I didn't want to take Ambien or anything like it, cause that stuff can royally mess you up. I recalled someone I know taking melatonin to help them sleep, so I went to CVS to see what was at my disposal. At first it seemed like there were so many choices of sleep aids, then I saw it... GUMMIES! Yes, melatonin gummies. Needless to say that me, being the mature adult that I am, bought the gummies.

So that night I took the recommended dose of 2 gummies. If any of y'all are wondering about the taste... they taste good enough. I prefer these over pineapple flavored gummy bears if that means anything. After a little while I started to feel tired. Not a "I'm stoned off my ass tired", just a normal tired feeling... which was a pleasant surprise. When I got tired enough to where I put my head on my pillow I was asleep within ten minutes. That's practically unheard of for me! I spent the next couple of days experimenting with timing and all that fun stuff. I found that if I take two gummies around 9pm I'm usually asleep by 2am (that sounds late... but that's pretty damn good for me). I've been taking the gummies every day for a little over two weeks and I've noticed a massive change in my sleep schedule. I've been falling asleep earlier, faster, and waking up in the morning has been sooooooooooooooooo much easier. The only "side-effect" that I've noticed is that I had some crazy-ass dreams for the first few days. My personal favorite melatonin-induced dream was that I was at a party, and then all of the sudden someone there tried to assassinate Natalie Portman... yeah... maybe it means something?

Me thinks it means that these gummies are freaking awesome. I really like how it just helps me get tired naturally, and when I do feel tired I don't feel like I'm drugged. Maybe one day I'll mess around with doses... but for now I'm pretty content.

Crippies Tippie - Gummy Vitamins are freaking awesome, regardless of your age

Play It By Ear

Ello!

I hope y'all had a great weekend and Monday. My weekend went as well as it could have considering the circumstances. The unveiling went very well and I got to spend time with my relatives. We paid tribute to my aunt in the best way we could... we ate massive amounts of food and celebrated her life. My aunt was a very special person and she will never be forgotten. As her headstone says "Always loving... always loved."

In non-death related news, my sleep schedule is starting to regulate. Granted, I'm still falling asleep at ungodly hours of the night, but not as terrible as weeks prior. I'll probably obtain some melatonin one of these days to help get my ass to sleep faster.

It's hard to believe it's almost been a month since my surgery, and I'm pretty much fully recovered. The incision area is still a teensy bit sore, but it's completely bearable. The scar hasn't keloided yet, but it is a lovely dark pink color. Now that my sciatic nerve is free from irritation my right leg seems to moving easier, and my limp is getting better, my leg still drags a little... but it's not noticeable to the untrained eye.

In pet news, we have a sad little pooch on our hands. Poor Angel has a double ear infection :( . She HATES having anyone touch her ears and God help you if you try to put medicine in 'em. Let's just say we're gonna have a lot of fun trying to muzzle her twice a day to give her the meds *sigh*. Oh well, the joys of being a pet owner. Angel's probably gonna hate us for the next few weeks. We do have some handy dandy turkey to bribe her into liking us again though. In the meantime she requests healing ninja vibes and healing yummy turkeys.

MY LIFE IS SO HARD!!!!!

Crippie's Tippie - Dog mad at you? Feed 'em until they forgive you ;)

The Limping Dead

Bonjour!

Thank y'all for all the awesome suggestions to remedy my friggin insomnia. I used to take tylenol PM every night for well over a year, so naturally I'm now immune to the stuff. Has anyone tried melatonin pills? Do they work?

In the mean time I'm trying to regulate my sleep schedule, but it's certainly a challenge. I had a rather busy day today so hopefully that'll knock me out. I had a long-ish day at work, mainly due to my coworkers and I discussing the return of "The Walking Dead" tomorrow. We all agreed that Lori needs die as soon as humanly possible. If she croaked in the first episode I would not complain. We also discussed our plans for surviving a zombie apocalypse. The general consensus among us was that if we weren't able to barricade ourselves in our homes until the wave of zombies passed, we'd probably die fairly quickly. On the bright side, if I were to become a zombie my limp would be comedically worse than the other zombies. Or I'd probably just end up like bicycle girl and drag my mostly lifeless body with my arms. Yes, this is actually how I spent my day at work.

After work I went to see a stellar performance of "The Last Five Years" at the local community college. Oh my lawd I loved it. The production, sets, orchestrations, acting, EVERYTHING was amazing. It was an amazingly complex two person show about the rise and fall of a relationship. If any of my local readers are interested in seeing it, HERE is the website.

Now, I really should be getting to bed. I have a loooooonnnnngggggg day ahead of me tomorrow. I'm attending the unveiling for my aunt, who passed away last year. While it won't be a "happy" day by any means, I'll get to see some relatives that I haven't seen for a few years. That'll be good at least. Besides tomorrow is not about mourning the dead, it's about celebrating them.

I hope y'all have a lovely Sunday

Crippie's Tippie - Appreciate your relatives while you have them

Crippie Gets Trolled By Several Small Animals

Ello Everybody, I hope all my readers are keeping safe with the Hurricane/Tropical Storm

Yup, it's another one of those "Lol, I can't sleep so I'm blogging at 3 in the morning" kinda days. Go figure, I can't sleep on a day that I really should be getting a good night sleep, oh wells. And why should I be getting a good night sleep? What's so special about tomorrow (today, whatever)? I'm not gonna tell y'all just yet, but I will say that I'm going to a super awesome groovy place tomorrow and I'm very excited.

In the meantime my pets have been trolling for the past two days.

First let's start with the doggies. Angel and Helen went to the vet and needed to be sedated for a few hours. Angel is a 20 pound Lhasa Apso. It's pretty safe to say that she HATED her vet experience as she tried to kill the 3 people trying muzzle her. Once they finally knocked her out her teeth cleaning went well. When she woke up she was higher than a kite. She was an oddly snuggly puppy during the drive home and the remainder of the night asleep on my Grandma's couch. Today she woke with a general demeanor of "WHERE AM I... also... I'M SO HUNGRY". Angel was still pretty loopy today, she was rolling around on the floor, whacking into walls, sleeping in random places, all that fun stuff. She'll probably be back to her old self tomorrow, but in the meantime she's a silly puppy.

Helen is a 7 pound shih tzu. She also thought that killing the vet would be a wise idea. Once they sedated her, her cleaning went off without a hitch. When she woke up she was also higher than a kite. She would sleep, smile, scream at nothing, and occasionally crash into something. The funniest part of her adventure is that they needed to shave part of her legs. Angel had to be partially shaved too... but she isn't a little runt like Helen. Helen is now known as "Chicken Legs" and "Shih Poodle".

Last but not least, the guinea pigs. Mama Pig managed to scare the crap out of me today. Before I tell y'all this little story there is one thing you need to know, guinea pigs usually sleep with their eyes open... at least a little. I went to check on the pigs and I see Mama Pig sleeping peacefully, a little too peacefully. She's flat, her eyes are closed, she's not moving, I don't see her breathing, and her eyes look kinda greyish white. I stand there for a second and think "OH MY GOD SHE'S DEAD". I rattled a bag of treats, SHE DIDN'T FREAKIN' MOVE. Now I was realllllyyyyyy thinking that she was dead. Then I poked her and thank goodness she woke up, but she gave me the biggest stink eye that practically said "Bitch, I WAS SLEEPING". Thanks Mama Pig, you managed to scare the living daylights out of me. You win. Oy vey, I guess I need to remember that older pigs tend to be deeper sleepers.

Crippie's Tippie - Senior pigs are assholes, also shaved dogs are humorous 

Sleeping Crippie

Greetings!

I hope all my crippled comrades had a marvelous weekend, Crippie especially hopes that her local cripples enjoyed that heatwave. It was so freakin' hot this weekend, my goodness. Luckily I didn't have to outside for many reasons. I was worried about all of animals but thankfully I had no reason to worry. The piggies got through the heatwave unscathed, Helen enjoyed sleeping in the warm grass when she would go out for walks (she really is lazy), and Angel hated the weather, but she got ice cubes in her water which she enjoyed. So all is well in Crippie's animal kingdom.

This weekend was rather eventful for my family. I got the see the final two performances of my sister's show. The last couple of shows were damn near sold out. While I have no proof, I'm gonna say that my publicity is totally responsible for it. Crippie had a jolly time at all of the productions and I have now memorized most of the show. This happens every time I see one of my sister's shows. I end up memorizing 'em. I can still recite most of the songs from "Into The Woods" and that show was over 5 years ago :D. Anyways... here are some pics I took over the weekend...

Helen is a lazy bum

She steals my pillows, all the freakin' time 

A view near the playhouse, gotta love the Hudson River!

Passed a carnival on the way home 

Sunday on the Hudson with a Sailboat (broadway humor) 

And Crippie was killing time by taking pictures

Moving on, Crippie has a question for her readers. It seems that I have a loooooot of difficulty in the "going to sleep" department. My usual night time schedule is to usually go on the computer until I feel like I'm going to pass out. At the point I fall asleep rather quickly. The problem is that it is around 3-4 in the morning when this occurs. I could simply get off my damn computer at a decent hour, but here lies the problem... say Crippie is rather tired, but not ready to pass out tired. If I were to simply go to bed all of the sudden Fanny would decide to act up, so you've got a good 45 minutes of tossing and turning there. After I get comfy-ish my shoulder will be like "OHAI... I'm gonna hurt you now!" so I spend another 45 minutes popping my shoulder and tossing and turning. THEN my neck will be like, "Ya, know... I was comfier the other way". THEN my hip will be like "WTF... I WAS COMFY BEFORE!". Long story short it takes me hours to fall asleep. Me thinks I need to find a way to get to the "I'm about to pass out" stage sooner. Any suggestions readers? 

Crippie's Tippie - One thing I've tried that has had mild success was to do sudoko puzzles at night with low light. It strains my eyes and makes me sleepier sometimes. Other times I get really focused on the puzzle and stay up trying to solve it. Not perfect, but better than nothing.