ARE YOU BLIND!

Yo!

Funny story for y'all today...

Today was a day of doctor's appointments. I saw my pain doctor today. It went well but that's not the main story today. Angel and Helen went to the vet (they're fine, they just had check-ups and shots). It was an all day event. Right before I went into my doctor's appointment we received a call from the vet's office about the dogs. I answered the phone. The conversation went as follows...

Vet Person - Hi... um... we have some concerns about Angel and Helen
Crippie - Uh oh, what's wrong
Vet Person in a very nervous tone - Um... well... with Helen... we.... um... the doctor believes something is wrong with her eyes... he doesn't think she can see anything
Crippie - Well yeah... she's blind.
Vet Person - Oh... um... has she seen a specialist?
Crippie - Yeah, she has detached retinas. She's completely blind.
Vet Person - Oh... ok

Helen is blind eh?

So it looks like someone forgot to add the whole "HELEN IS FREAKING BLIND" thing to her record. LOL FAIL. Needless to say we've been joking about this event for the remainder of the day. Everyone is saying I should have told the vet person "BUT SHE COULD SEE THIS MORNING!" just to mess with her. We're also pretending to be devastated by this tragic turn of events in Helen's life. Helen is coping with this in the only way she knows how to, by sleeping, eating treats, and cuddling with her humans. She's so brave ;)

It's hard to be Helen

Seriously though, if you look at Helen's eyes it's really obvious that she cannot see. You can see through them when the light is right. 

Needless to say, today was thoroughly entertaining. Something tells me we're gonna be saying "OH MY GOD HELEN IS BLIND" at random times for the next few days

Crippie's Tippie - OH MY GOD HELEN IS BLIND!!!!!! 

Crippie's Actual Tippie - Sometimes it's better to laugh at the stupidity of others rather than getting mad at them

My Dog Is A Psychic Now

Ohai!

As the title suggests, something very interesting happened tonight.

As most of y'all know, I have a blind dog named Helen. She barks whenever she hears noises that displease her. These noises can vary from knock on the door, people shouting, The Jersey Shore, Angel, strangers, the sound of a door opening etc. Helen also sleeps in my bed with me, she likes my pillows and she also takes pride in defending me from serial killers every night.

Anyways, tonight I heard noises which I thought where just my house settling, cause ya know, houses do that. Helen was NOT fond of these noises. Even though she was sleeping she would let out a little *grumble grumble* whenever she heard one. At first I would tell her "Helen, it's the house settling". The settling sounds continue sporadically for another hour or so. Each time Helen grumbles. These sounds were pretty damn faint. I kept looking at Helen like "Everyone else in the house is sleeping! What is wrong with you child?". Eventually these sounds got more and more frequent, and Helen was getting pissed at me. I'm still thinking Helen is an idiot until I hear a massive CRASH! I have bookshelves mounted to my wall. One fell down. Some rather heavy books came crashing down with it. I turned on my light to check out the damage, and even though Helen is blind I swear she was looking at me like "BITCH I TOLD YOU THAT WOULD HAPPEN!". Luckily no harm or damage was done. I guess my books were a little heavy.

Helen wouldn't stop judging me until I have her some treats. After she nommed on a few dog cookies, her smug little ass went back to bed. I'm now convinced that this little squirt is smarter than she looks.

I saved your life. YOU'RE WELCOME!  

BELLY RUBS OF GRATITUDE PLEASE! 

Crippie's Tippie - Don't put heavy books on wall mounted shelves

Helen's Tippie - LISTEN WHEN I'M BARKING AT THINGS! 

I Vant to Take Your Blood!

Mwahahahaha

We're inching ever closer to the one week point peoples! Fanny is starting to feel the pressure, she was hurting like a bitch today.

I started the whole pre-op process today with the ever traditional ceremony of the taking of the blood. Usually my veins cooperate with the lovely technicians but I've had times where either the person sucked (lol vampire pun) or my veins were being stupid. The person who took my blood did a good job  and I hardly felt it. Although the main reason I didn't feel anything was because I was rather distracted. Ya see, the room I was in was completely plastered in pictures of kittehs. Being the internet female that I am I just kept thinking of how hilarious kittehs were (and one of said kittehs looked like one of my biggest fans Mario). I was completely mesmerized with kittehs and the blood was taken before I even knew it. So thank you internet, you made that whole experience very much bearable. My arm was kinda sore for about an hour or so after and I hardly bruised... all in all... not bad.

Since Fanny's removal is inching closer and closer, I'm starting the final preparations... tons of practice on the stairs, crutches around the house, filing for disability, making sure the piggies are content, make sure meds are in order, and a tiny bit of grocery shopping (I'll get into that when we actually do it).

My actual pre-ops are scheduled for Wednesday morning, usually at this point I get a teeeeeeennyyy bit nervous. My appetite starts to decrease and all those sorta fun things. I haven't noticed any symptoms of anxiety yet :D We'll see what the rest of the week brings, I wouldn't be surprised if I royally jinxed myself with all this "I'M NOT NERVOUS LOL" speak. Alas, only time will tell.

On a completely random note, everyone in my house was watching "The Voice" tonight. Helen was facing the TV and she appeared to be "watching" it. All of the sudden they mention "TONIGHT IS THE START OF THE BLIND AUDITIONS" and Helen starts barking like a mad woman. Helen is just easily offended I guess, either that or she hates Carson Daily (distinct possibility there).

Crippie's Tippie - If you have pets, make sure that someone will be able to take care of your pets, and that you have enough supplies to keep them happy.

Holy Pressure Changes Batman!

Ohai!

Holy crap I'm getting lazy with regular posting, sorry 'bout that. Mother nature has been kicking Crippie's ass for the past few days. There have been some crazy pressure changes around here, so Crippie has been feeling kinda bleh overall. Lots of pain meds, NPH, and extra naps.
On top of the pressure changes it appears Crippie is also developing allergies. Apparently Crippie's lungs are special, if I smell something really strong like cigarette smoke or lots of perfume I choke and start having a coughing fit. BTW, if you're smoking by me and I start obnoxiously coughing I'm not trying to be a dick... I honestly can't breathe. For the past couple of days I've been getting seemingly random periods of feeling tightness in my airway... super fun. Oh well, at least allergy medicine helps.
So what does Crippie do on days when she can't function? Well, recently all of Crippie's co-workers convinced her that she needed to start watching "The Walking Dead", so I've been doing that. I got through the entire first season in three days! One perk of being a cripple, I'm pretty much used to blood and gore so I'm not phased by seeing all these zombies getting their faces smashed in. I've also gotten pretty familiar with how the human body works, so I've been analyzing how all the zombies move and determining their mental capacities! Yes, this how Crippie spends her downtime, determining the mental capacities of zombies.

And here's another photo dump to make up for not posting in several days!

Me and Helen playing around 

Me holding Helen like a baby (kinda shocked that this picture turned out as well as it did)

Frida and Nellie sleeping in their cuddle cups  

Crippie saw a rainbow at work a couple of days ago and was able to snap a pic!

Now Crippie's Sew Able Doll has a piggie too! I received a lovely guinea pig shaped soap from http://cavysavvy.blogspot.com/. It reminds me of Emma <3

Crippie's Tippie - Before getting addicted to a TV show, be sure to find ways of watching all the seasons.

Heat Pack Challenge - Day 15

Hello!

First off, thank you all for the kind words about my product review, I really hope y'all enjoyed it. Crippie certainly had a lot of fun making it, although I realized that you could probably have a drinking game for every time I said "FREAKIN' AWESOME" but hey... all the more reason to watch the video, right ;)

Moving on, it's been a little over a week since I mentioned my FREAKIN AWESOME (yeah, I'm owning up to it) heat pack. I decided to name my heat pack Neil Patrick Harris, cause let's face it... NPH IS FREAKIN AWESOME. I've been using NPH every night for at least two hours and my pain levels have significantly decreased. The combination of heat and pain meds has put Crippie in a pretty happy place as far as pain management goes, and that's (say it with me now) FREAKIN AWESOME! Again, Crippie is well aware that using a heat pack for the duration of time is not recommended, but Crippie don't give a damn!

Since it's a short post today, here's some pictures of the animals!

Mama Pig being cute

Way to ruin the picture mom - Aggi

Helen sleeping on my bed

Angel says "What? Your bed is comfy... sue me" (and thats my old heat pack next to her)

Crippie's Tippie - Heat packs are awesome, but they are not magic cure alls. If something is really bothering you consult a doctor.

Hey Good Lookin'

Whuzzup Y'all

I hope y'all had a lovely Thursday. Crippie's day was pretty uneventful. Mother Nature decided to be stupid and change the weather in the middle of the night. It took Crippie 4 hours to go to sleep. Yeah... today was one of those days where I was too achy to do anything of use. Although I am currently "babysitting" Helen while her mommy is still sick. While Helen loves me she is making clear that I am not her mommy. For a blind dog she gives a really convincing death stare.

Now on to Pig-tures! Maggie says "thank you" to everyone who thinks she's pretty. Tonight we are going to focus on her cage mate Aggie. Aggie is a blonde, black, and white shorthair who is a little over 2 years old. She is known as "Good Lookin' Pig" in my house. Her hobbies include eating her feelings, eating jewelry, and eating plastic. When we first obtained Aggie she showed some signs of piggie depression. The depression went away as soon as she realized that we have comfy beds, toys, and most importantly... FOOD. She is our loudest wheeker, I can hear her when I'm listening to music with headphone on... on the other side of the house.

I SMELL FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD

I might be a fat pig, but I'm a cute fat pig! Look at my lovely markings.

See, I'm freaking adorable!

BEAUTY SHOT! Look at them whiskas!

If you thought Maggie was cute... I probably just blew your cute filled mind!

 Crippie's Tippie- Piggie depression can actually be very serious, weigh your sad piggies daily to make sure they are eating.

2011 Re(handi)cap!

Sorry about the lame pun, IT HAD TO BE DONE!

Before I begin my 2011 update, Emma thanks everyone for the ninja vibes thus far. I see a slight improvement today but it's kinda hard to tell.

On to the recap!

JANUARY

-Crippie had her 10th Surgery 

FEBRUARY

-Crippie started this blog!!! 

MARCH THRU APRIL

-Crippie worked on finishing college

-Crippie briefly became "living impaired" after a chance encounter with some zombies. Crippie was cured a few hours later. Brains are oddly tasty.

-Crippie took a road trip to Yale. Mainly so I could tell people I went to Yale, see the impressed looks on their faces, and then see the disappointed looks when they find out it was only a day-trip

MAY

-Crippie has her senior project exhibit

-Crippie FREAKIN' GRADUATED COLLEGE... MAGNA CUM LAUDE BABY!

JUNE THRU AUGUST

-CRIPPLEFESSSTTTTTTT

SEPTEMBER

-Crippie got a job!

-We adopted Helen! 

OCTOBER

-Crippie got a car! 

NOVEMBER

-ummm... nothing really happened in November

DECEMBER

-Crippie turned 23

-Crippie got a tattoo! 

So that's about it. I seriously want to thank everyone who's been reading this blog, posting comments, etc. it really means a lot to me. Crippie hopes you all have a happy and healthy 2012. CHEERS! 

Crippie's Tippie - The cure for Zombie-ism? It's simple, all you need is to splash the effected person with make-up remover. 

NHBPM- DONE!

*Gives virtual cookies and skittles out*

It's November 30th and you know what that means... NATIONAL HEALTH BLOG POST MONTH IS OVER! DONE! The final prompt is... Play that horn. Want to hear a secret? You’re awesome. (It’s actually not even really a secret.) This is going to be hard for you, O Modest One, but you gotta give yourself props today. Write three things you love about yourself – things you’re great at – or just want to share. Don’t you dare signpost or undercut those self-compliments!

Anyone who actually knows me knows that I'm not terribly modest... if I do something awesome I let people know. So... I COMPLETED THE 30 CHALLENGE, YAY ME! Granted a missed the first day but I was allowed a post skip day. 

Now, about that actual list of things Crippie is awesome at... 

-Crippie is very, very good at rises to challenges. Senior thesis in 4 months instead of 8, DONE. Perfect attendance in high school and college, CHECK. Graduate Magna Cum Laude, CHALLENGE COMPLETED. 30 blog posts in 30 days, FREAKIN' DONE!!!!

-Crippie is an awesome graphic designer. Hey, I spent like, 30 seconds kerning that little "BOO YA" thing above (kerning is adjusting the space between the letters FYI).

-Crippie is apparently an animal whisperer. I dunno, I feel like I "know" what my guinea pigs and puppies want/think and I speak for them often. (Helen is sitting next to me BTW, she says "I AM TRYING TO SLEEP... STOP ASKING ME WHAT I WANT TO TELL YOUR READERS!").

I could go on but alas, the prompt said three things ;) 

OMG... I just noticed this is my 100th post! Kinda fitting ain't it? 

Crippie's Tippie- I've said it before and I'll say it again, celebrate all the victories in your life. I might be tired and in a fair amount of pain... BUT I COMPLETED THE 30 DAY CHALLENGE!!!!! BOOM!

This post was written as part of NHBPM – 30 health posts in 30 days: http://bit.ly/vU0g9J 

Doctor Visits and Blind Puppies

Hello There!

I hope everybody has been enjoying their week. I've been pretty busy working. Thursdays are my days off so I did what any normal 22 year old would do on a day like this, I went to my pain management doctor for my bi-monthly checkup. The check-up went well, no complaints and no med changes, works for me. My doctor got to see my in my full out "it is raining and I can't move" mode and she was quite fascinated by it.
I think that having a nice doctor makes the whole "having to go to the doctor" experience suck a whole lot less. If my physician was a total asshole I would be pretty miserable about having to go. I mean, whenever I have to go to this doctor I have to walk into a building that is filled with sick, elderly people, thus making me feel sick and old. Answering all the initial questions like "how long have you this problem" and "where does it hurt" with answers like "all of my life" and "well... lets just say everything from the neck down hurts" can be very disheartening, especially when the nurse very awkwardly says "oh". Luckily my doctor is awesome, she treats me like a human, a young one at that. We had a dandy conversation about me finding employment and all fun stuff. All the other crap related to doctor's visits I can deal with, lord knows there are people who have far worse experiences. I cannot deal with a crappy doctor, I'd have to be pretty freakin' desperate before I let some jerk take care of me.

On a lighter note, my "niece" Helen is adjusting to life at my house rather nicely. She's getting very good at not smacking into walls. You can hardly tell she is blind sometimes. Naturally Auntie Crippie spoils Helen and gives her lots of treats and belly rubs. I figured you guys would want to behold the cuteness that is Helen, so here are some pictures of us chillin'

Crippie's Tippie- Finding a doctor that treats you like a person versus a patient sometimes makes all the difference in the world.